One Thursday every month I cook for a couple hundred people--or sometimes 400 or more people. One never knows the numbers.
It's a community 'thang'. We have a concert in our wee little park, food and fun. There are maybe 1750 of us here. Almost too big for me, anymore. I love 'little' towns. Here, we cannot grow much bigger given the geography and the penchance of all of us to see that it doesn't. From those before me, I was handed that baton, and others now have accepted it from me. These are not small changes, they are huge monumental changes.
I used to sing at these events, now I cook. I miss singing a lot. A whole lot. Music is a sense of my soul. No matter how old, one never loses that.
I am getting older, though, and my voice just doesn't sustain as it once did. I am also much more introspective and perhaps feeding versus entertaining is just part of that. So, I cook, and enjoy it, and others sing and I enjoy it. It's the progression of life. I have heard some just killer voices with some truly exceptional renditions of songs that I could have only hoped to sing so well at these events. No matter how old we get, I can only hope we sincerely appreciate those that have a "new take" on things.
The best times at these events, though, are when they are over. We're moving tables, stacking goods and laundry (gads, like I EVER need more laundry to do with all the animals... almost funny in concept), sorting the recycling, and are working in near dark, the stars above us, mostly one-on-one in near absolute ambient silence. These times--these precious times--are the water for my personal garden.
These times say so much about a person. The things they say and do--or don't say and do. One can surmise a troubled or happy soul, or a lost one.
Tonight was special for me in a way that goes far beyond romantic love, but into personal appreciative love. A friend I have known for years said, for the first time, I love you, thank you so much.
Nothing cryptic about it. Nothing obviously unusual. Nothing romantic. I think for the first time he trusted me enough to tell me how he felt. I've known him for many years. Who knows what apparent line I crossed into love, or what line he crossed into saying so.
But what a nice thing, after a whole day of work, to have someone say thank you and I love you.
Ya know, it just doesn't get much better than that. At least not for me.
How do we find middle ground?
5 years ago
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